Diana has been my fitness instructor for many years now- Les Mills body pump, fitness dancing, body combat and boot camp! She's pushed and driven me all these years. However, I had never heard her story. What a journey she's had and how much she's overcome.
I fought for years with my weight and I’ll never forget the moment I hit my breaking point. Growing up from my childhood and throughout my teenage years I was bullied. I was bullied because of the way I looked; I was always told by multiple people that my legs are to big for a girl, that I was ugly, and fat. Hearing that over and over again as a young girl just made me feel so low. I was unhappy, uncomfortable, and hated the way I looked in clothes. I didn’t have any self esteem or confidence in my own skin. I would always try to cover myself up with extra baggy clothing, I was shy and felt like I was hiding inside my own shell. Eventually I was sick and tired of feeling so sick and tired. At my heaviest I was 175lbs, and that was my breaking point; seeing that number on the scale turned my stomach and all I could think is “how is this possible”, I’ve been athletic my entire life yet I looked horrible in my eyes. At first I tried altering my foods and making healthier food choices, and got introduced to the gym. By getting introduced to the gym pretty much means just doing lots of cardio cause I had no idea what else to do there and it was a very uncomfortable atmosphere. After a couple of weeks I noticed I lost about 5 to 10 pounds and that just lit a fire inside me and gave me the push I needed. Because I was still not comfortable in the gym I was determined to find something else to push myself to that next level of fitness. So, I decided to purchase the “Insanity” workout dvd, and with the dvd you get a meal guide and I’d follow it for about 5 days then fall off and this was a repeating cycle. And I started to see my body plateauing. From that point on everything started clicking in a bad way for me, I put in my head that the problem with my weight was food.....all food. At this point I weighed about 160lbs, and I came up with this wild conclusion that in order to be skinny I had to start fearing food. I would wake up every morning and weigh myself, I started working out 3 times as much, I restricted myself to 500-700 calories max per day and if my weight went up after a meal I would make myself throw up. I knew deep down what I was doing was wrong and it didn’t make me feel better, it made me feel worse. I would stand in front of the mirror and pull / pinch my skin in the areas I considered fat. I was so exhausted and drained that I would cry myself to sleep every night because all I wanted was to eat. I dropped 40lbs in less than a month. The moment my mother found out what I was doing was when I was at my all time low and I knew I needed help otherwise I would have had to be admitted to a hospital. I was diagnosed with 2 types of eating disorders, and if it wasn’t for my mom I do not know where I would be today. All I wanted to do was learn how to do things the right way and feel happy with the way I look. I was tired of envying the way other girls looked. I knew I had to start this new journey some place. Today.....4 years later with everything I’ve been through I take it one day at a time and I’ve learned to love my body and how I am built. I am not a size 0, nor will I ever be. I found love at the gym. I love to lift weights, and now I am lucky enough to inspire others to do the same. I am far from perfect. I do slip up every once in a while except now my slip ups consist of my head stuck in a bag of potato chips; but the difference is how willing you are to fight through the toughest days that get thrown at you.
